My 11 year old daughter has started watching a couple shows on TLC called Four Weddings and Say Yes to the Dress. Sometimes I sit with her to watch the brides plan their weddings and pick out the perfect dress so that it all comes together on their special day.
One recent afternoon, she asked to see my wedding dress. So, we got it out. She tried on my shoes - they fit her and they do not fit me anymore! Ack! She tried on the veil - sniff sniff. She told me that she loved my dress but thought she'd want one of her own. Of course. Then she spun around my room in that veil dreaming of who she might meet at the end of THE aisle one day.
She said, "Do you remember your wedding day like it was the most special day of your life?"
Absolutely. It was.
In her sweet little girl mind, she is thinking of the wedding - the dress, the veil, the flowers and where it will be - the beach! I can handle that!
So, I took the opportunity to tell her that while the wedding was awesome and a day I'll never forget, that marrying the right guy is the most important.
"How do you know when you have the right guy?" she asked
I am celebrating 15 years of marriage today. As a young bride, I lived under this goal to at least make it to 14 years - I don't even know that I thought about marriage past that. My parents divorced after 14 years of marriage. I guess in some strange way, I always thought that if I made it past then we were home free! :)
What I know now is that I just married the right guy for me.
How do I know that?
- He's the one who I can't imagine doing life without - even when life with him is not perfect.
- He's the one who loved me when I gained 80 pounds with our first child, 70 with the second and 60 with our third and still told me that I was beautiful.
- He's the one who still makes me laugh.
- He loves Jesus.
- The one who still works hard to make me happy.
- The one who provides for us,leads our family, he wants to be the one who talks to his kids about money,dating, how to be respectful, have God talks and all that stuff we need to tell our kids!
- He believes in me and he supports me in using the gifts God has given me.
- He makes dinner AND cleans up AND mows the lawn!
- He books trips for us to go away - tonight we will be HERE! (And got a good deal to top it off!)
- I could go on and on... but this is for sure... for me, he is the right guy.
The advice I'd like to give my daughter is this: Marry someone who will love God like you love God. Marry someone who believes that commitment and friendship are the most important parts of a marriage. Marry someone who when the goin' gets tough will stick it out, will work hard to grow and will love you more because of it. Marry someone who works hard. Marry for love. Marry to make a family. Marry for joy. Marry for companionship. Marry because you have fun together. Marry because he makes you laugh. Marry for life.